Luxulyan stood at the edge of a lake looking up into the darkening sky, its’ feeding roots burrowed in the ground, drinking the water, tasting and feeding on the minerals of the earth around it. Watching and waiting, the calm silence enveloped its’ senses. Luxulyan had been scared of that silence once, long ago. So terrified had it been that it had almost lost its’ mind to despair. 

A point of light in the night sky caught Luxulyans’ attention. A slender tendril, the questing shoot of a Celestial Vine, wormed its’ way across the heavens towards the planet upon which Luxulyan stood. Many races couldn’t see or sense it, but to an Unfallen, a Celestial Vine was like a beacon, lighting up the darkness.

Luxulyans’ heart filled with eager anticipation. Looking out across the lake, it reflected on the life it had lived so far.

Life had started as a seed. Its parent, not “mother” or “father” as both were one and the same to the Unfallen, had lived a longer than usual life as a Second. Its’ parents' heart had always been as fickle as the wind and it wasn’t until meeting another Unfallen, one with a stonier heart that grounded its parents’ spirit, did it settle and turn its’ thoughts towards becoming a Third. They had loved each other for a time, exchanging pollen so that each would carry a seed from the other.

Not long after parting ways, Luxulyans’ parent finally took root and became a Third, dropping the many seeds from its past relations. Other Seconds came with the “fire that renews” to crack the thick resin shells of the seeds and allow them to germinate.

And so Luxulyan came into being, sending a root out into the soil under the protective shadow of its’ parent. Those first memories were not its’ own, it had learnt them from listening to the creaks and whispers of the surrounding forest as it grew into a young First. Always attentive and learning from the murmurings of the Heart, it shared in the memories and teachings that were given freely. There was not much else to do when one was rooted to the ground.

Then came the fire from the sky and the whole of Koyasil groaned and rustled with surprise, debate and purpose. Thirds were asked and shaped into ships to carry Seconds that left the home world in numbers that would rival the number of leaves on the wind during a Fall.

Luxulyan became aware of its watery heart, yearning to join the others and seek new worlds to explore, in the way streams seek out rivers. It strained to gain control of its roots and branches. The change from First to Second could not happen quick enough and Luxulyan would not listen to the forests calls for patience. 

Finally, at just 9m tall, Luxulyan was able to uproot itself and take its first steps. It walked straight to the nearest port, ascending the stalks to a ship and left Koyasil almost without a second thought.

Luxulyan ended up at a waystation along one of the Vines, where it enjoyed being taller than the other sentient races, after being dwarfed by most of its own kind. The different races fascinated Luxulyan, but it found that they did not fully understand the Unfallen outlook on life. The Unfallen were still newcomers to the space farers of the galaxy. Wanting to seek out further, it joined the crew of a merchant ship and squeezed itself into the cargo hold, the only compartment big enough to accommodate it.

When the ship jumped to warp and left the system, Luxulyan felt a growing sense of anxiety, an uncertainty of what it was doing. It couldn’t decide where the feeling was coming from until they made it to the next system. Looking out a viewport, it realised it couldn’t see any vines, couldn’t hear the reassurances of the Heart.

Dread filled Luxulyan to the core, panic ate away at its mind. Luxulyan had been too hasty, it had not known that the galaxy was silent beyond the Vines. It did not know how to cope and begged the ships’ captain to turn around and take it back, but the dour Lumeris would not have it. She did not understand the Unfallens’ problem and to her, the cargo and the Dust was more important.

Two more jumps, two more systems away from all it had known and Luxulyan stamped its roots and rattled its branches in fits of hysteria, scaring the crew and denting the bulkheads.

By the time they got to the fifth system, the captain had had enough. She landed the ship on the nearest habitable world and forced Luxulyan out of the cargo hold. The ship launched for the heavens, leaving Luxulyan lost, alone and terrified.

Luxulyan roamed the planet aimlessly, the number of days a mystery amidst the fugue of its’ mind. The world was mostly arid, with long hot days and very cold nights. Forgetting to feed properly, Luxulyan became wilted and hunched.

One evening, it saw a ship burn across the sky, an ugly pointed vessel with no thought for harmony. It flew over a nearby mountain and the sound of thunder echoed across the plain.

Luxulyans’ numb mind sparked with a forlorn hope and it wandered in the direction of the mountain. After a day it came upon the wreck of the ship and many bodies. Whilst searching the wreckage, it was attacked by lithe, four-armed creatures that appeared to be part machine. Too weak and unable to defend itself, Luxulyan had tried to run but was outwitted and quickly cornered.

As the violent creatures prepared to leap, a flash of light burned them from existence. From over the hill strode an Unfallen, standing proud at over 24m tall, its crown of red leaves fluttering above it like a banner. Its smoking plasma weapon, bigger than most tanks, was hung low at the top of its roots. With an easy stride that spoke of a confident, fiery heart, it burnt away Luxulyans’ attackers, throwing and smashing any that got too close.

The Unfallen warrior called itself Marazion. It was part of an expedition to the planet and led Luxulyan to an outpost, where the rest of the crew were repairing their damaged Karga class vessel. Marazion nursed Luxulyan back to health with the help of another Unfallen called Veryan, the leader of the crew. They taught Luxulyan how to cope with the silence beyond the Vines. Veryan explained that the vessel was equipped with a beacon that would guide the Celestial Vines to the star system and bring the harmony of the Heart to this world.

Luxulyan knew its purpose then and asked to join Veryans’ crew. Luxulyan would stay on this planet, once a seeming hell, and learn about its nature. It would tend to it, plant the seeds for a new colony and make it ready for when the Vines finally came.

20 years later and Luxulyan was surrounded by a young forest. It had found peace, coming to realise that nothing was ever truly silent. This world had its own language in the rustling of the trees, the lapping of water on the shore, or the whistling of the wind across the mountains. 

As the Vine rooted itself and entwined the planet, Luxulyan rejoiced at hearing the soft sounds of the Heart once again. It swayed and drummed its roots and branches in happiness, along with Veryan, Marazion and the other members of the crew. Luxulyan looked up into the night sky and wondered which star it would visit next. 

All would be brought into harmony with the Heart.

Nice, I like this.

Unfallen are my favorite faction, their lots of things to like about them.

Your story has lots of cool ideas and I imagine that the unfallen must be fairly hard to write as they're emotions and thoughts more internal than external. I think because of this you tend to do too much telling rather than showing. E.g instead of telling us about how Luxulyan's parents are, one being fickle they other sturdy, you could describe their appearance connect it with their personalities and describe the mating ritual. That may be a bit much for a short story but if feel like there is a lot that could be added.

Otherwise, there's a lot of cool ideas in the story like how the unfallen build their ships, how they reproduce and how they feel about space travel, I just feel like some of these concepts could be better explored in a longer story. Some other minor criticism is the formatting, after the first paragraph it a wall of text. Do a new paragraph when you do a new scene or new thought unrelated to the last. Finally, we don't need to know exactly how high the unfallen is. The reader can figure that out when you say that the cargo hold is the only place in the ship that can hold the unfallen. Numbers are not emotive or very descriptive most of the time so where possible it is best to avoid them. 

Overall it's a nice read I think there are improvements to be made, regardless I enjoyed the story. Thank you for writing it, it must have taken some time to write hope you write some more.

Thank you for the advice, this one was a struggle to write because of all the concepts and i agree it would work better in a longer story where the explaining would be better paced, but i was restricting myself to around 5000 words to keep it a short read. Still working on my creative writing skills so every your feedback is good. Cheers!